pencandy:
“ feedmerightmeow:
“ I walk into the bedroom and I see Kattie being the little spoon. There is no room for me.
”
THAT IS THE ROUNDEST CAT I HAVE EVER SEEN
”

pencandy:

feedmerightmeow:

I walk into the bedroom and I see Kattie being the little spoon. There is no room for me.

THAT IS THE ROUNDEST CAT I HAVE EVER SEEN

(via pagingme)

my intrusive thoughts during fall


puppercat:

young man

there r leaves all around 

i said young man 

eat a leaf off the ground

(via ugly)

bewbin:

woah this could be like a meme

(Source: fifteenbread, via joshpeck)

(via unsounded)

vulcannic:
“ Don’t tease me like this Karl I s2g
”

vulcannic:

Don’t tease me like this Karl I s2g

(via elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey)

bakrua:

bakrua:

bakrua:

shitpostgenerator:

date a vintage cactus who puts ‘these aren’t really randomly generated’ in the dictionary just to fuck with people

i didnt realise this was posted by shitpostgenerator and i sat for like 10 minutes trying to work out wht this post meant

i did it again

guys ur not gonna fuckng believe

(via elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey)

elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:

wookieeleaks:

Is it weird if… yeah of course it’s weird, I fell in love with a fox. But I’m not alone… right? RIGHT?

This is what we all feared from this movie

(Source: thedatastorm)

cheatcommandos:

its 1:42 am and i just heard the unmistakeable sound of someone sprinting down the road wearing flip flops. good luck buddy

(via joshpeck)

fuchsiamae:

it’s been four years since horse_ebooks said it but I think “everything happens so much” is still the most relevant quote I’ve ever heard

(via chodeboy)

sharpedos:
“illumise:
““… Groups of 5”
ohshit
” ”

sharpedos:

illumise:

“… Groups of 5”

ohshit

image

(via ugly)

ive-got-a-dark-side:

lotrlocked:

get-your-ass-in-the-impala:

smurflewis:

gaysfinest:

Don’t tell your daughter that when a boy is mean or rude to her it’s because he has a crush on her. Don’t teach her that abuse is a sign of love.

My mom always taught me yell or fight back. Boys would be mean and I would yell back. I would get my ass pinched and I would smack them as hard as I could.

Who alway got in trouble? Me.

They would call my mother and she always came in and lectures my teachers and threatened to sue for making her miss work and treating me poorly.

She always taught my brothers to respect women. The only fights my brothers ever got in was defending women from someone else.

The school tried to call my father once instead of my mother on us. He came in in his full preacher outfit (being a preacher and all) and gave them an entire sermon on what would Jesus day of he was called in. They decided dealing with my mom was better.

I think my favorite story of this is when some kid snapped my bra and I turned around, didn’t even think about it, and punched that little motherfucker right in the nose.

So naturally, I end up in the principal’s office, refusing to apologize. 

“He shouldn’t have put his hands on me and I wouldn’t have hit him!” That’s the only thing I was saying.

These people had the unfortunate luck of catching my dad at home, instead of my mom. So he comes fucking sauntering in there, like he’s Clint fucking Eastwood in some western movie and looks at me. 

“Melissa, did you punch him?” 

“Yes.” I said. 

“Why?” 

“Because he snapped my bra strap.” 

And he turns his squinty eyed glare to the principal and says, “You’re telling me my daughter is in trouble because that squirrely looking kid put his hands on her and she chose to defend herself? That’s what you are saying to me.” 

“Well, sir-” The man kind of stuttered because my dad is kind of intimidating in the quiet sort of way that kind of whispers in the back of your mind that this person could be dangerous. “Melissa did make it physical.” 

“No. That kid put his hands on my daughter. Are you saying my daughter cannot defend herself when some boy decides to put hands on her? Is that what you are teaching my girl?” 

I didn’t get suspended that day.  

*slow clap for excellent parenting*

This is the parent I want to be omg

(Source: bullletproof-love, via boulevard-of-broken-yeets)

phoenixcollective:

reblog if you would be fine sharing a restroom with a transgender person

(via squidyword)

squidyword:

straightwhiteboyproblems:

tag yourself. I’m the bro that jumped down the staircase

im the plant on the floor

(Source: unfaggy, via thecommonchick)

friendlycoolguy:

friendlycoolguy:

*five minutes before closing  time at work*

me: nice now that  theres no customers i guess i can start closing up :-)

customer:

image

i just want everyone  to know  that  anyone who taged this with “im the customer”   you  are  not even funy

(Source: wadderboddle, via sophierosette)